Back to the start
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
I absolutely love this video.
"We always tell ourselves to look and move forward; isn't there something that we have lost in the past?"
After a long time, I'm finally starting to read back on my very old blog posts. I found out that in my first couple months of writing, I wrote like shit. My English didn't make sense and the sentence structure is all over the place.
Anyway, I found something that is consistent with my old writings. (at least the first few months that I've read) That is, they sounded happy. They are filled with energy and vibrance. Even so, I was going through some tough situations in life couple of years ago. I saw that I kept my head up high, and continued moving through the buckets of shit.
It's these times when I can actually look back in time, reading the words that I carefully crafted years ago. It brings warmth to my heart. It feels like I'm having a conversation with my younger self.
Recently, I seem to have lost the passion for skating. Slalom to be exact, I still love to skate around randomly. The feeling of being on wheels is hard to explain unless you've experienced it for yourself.
Years ago, I wrote that I fell down very badly after attempting a trick. Couldn't walk properly for days after that. That's interesting to me. It's like, I can actually see how I got to my current level of skating. It made me rethink about taking slalom more seriously. In fact, I probably would spend a little more time on it, since I could really use a good workout from time to time.
This is what I felt watching this video. That I have lost passion for things I used to love very deeply.
We keep trying to move forward, letting go and discarding things that anchor us down. Once in awhile, we should look back and see, was there something important we lost along the way?
Your passion for music, playing games, eating or collecting items? Or your childhood dreams of becoming a pilot and soar in the sky? Or your first love even?
This may seem counter-intuitive, but maybe we need an anchor to hold us down, and let us know where we belong in this huge empty world. We can keep moving forward, but it's nice to have a place you can call home.