The end of 2013
Tuesday, December 31, 2013

With 1 hour 3 mins left to a brand new year, I shall start writing my new year's eve post. Why the hell am I not out you ask? Well, it has something to do with this dreadful flu that has been bugging me for more than a week.

But no matter, looking on the bright side, this gives me the time to actually make this post. Did a quick search on my blog and found a couple of post related to new year.

I'm happy to say that I did manage to hit some of the resolutions that I made at the start of this year. Though I'm a little disappointed that I totally forgot about many of them.

Nevertheless, looking back, many things have happened this year. Huge events that help change, and shape my life into what it is today. Even though I don't particularly feel very strongly for this year, it has indeed been a rather important year.

Firstly, I have finally graduated from poly.#1 #2 #3
Then I got my ass dragged into serving the nation. Many things have happened and I wrote a couple of, "If there's one thing I'll say about the army". There's still that two field camps that I have totally been dragging forever to write. Then, after spending many dreadful days on that fucking island, I have finally passed out to be a private; POP loh!

Tried signing on but failed spectacularly, curses. (left the post there for my future self to laugh at) Got posted out to a new place, made friends, worked and played together.

Then all of a sudden, it's december 31st. 6 months since I have enlisted in the army. Half a year, I can't believe that I actually graduated from school this year. School, normal life just feels like a fairy tale, a made up place to me now. So many things have changed, sometimes I'm not sure if I know what is going on in my own life, sometimes I feel like I'm just being carried by some invisible force to wherever the universe intended for me to land up at.

But well, as they say
"The only constant is change."

It's not necessarily bad per say. Been through some experience that I would never get a chance to go through otherwise, but given a choice I definitely wouldn't want to go through everything again. I guess what I'm really trying to say is that, I'm just trying to live to the fullest in this little world that I've been confined to.

Some awesome things that have came out from army (for me personally) is that I have somewhat regained the passion to write with a pen. 3 years in poly has spoiled me and I hated writing notes in analog. I have learned to endure through more shit, though I'm not really sure if I really have changed at all. Though I think I have learned to work with others a little better now.

Oh, I also picked up a new programming language in camp. At times, people ask me why. To which my reply is, why not? If I really had to put it down in words, I suppose I'm a really whimsical person. It's not that I do things without reason, but that I feel like doing things without reason, then I think whether it's logical to do it or not; if yes, then I go crazy with it, if no, I will chuckle at my own idiosyncrasies. (which explains why I sometimes just laugh for seemingly no reason at all)

Okay I'm kind of side tracking here.
So why did I spend all that energy to learn something I will most probably not use in the future?
(because my course of study probably has nothing to do with it, probably)
I'm restless. I feel like I'm dying inside, dying of boredom. It's not that we don't have anything to do in camp, it's quite the opposite. (though the free time we have is substantial as well) But the thing is, I really don't care about the things I'm learning. It's interesting yes, but it's a dead thing, like a stone set in place. Nothing new nor exciting happens and will ever happen. Sometimes it just feels like I'm meant for something more you know, like all the super hero movies I watch as a kid, I want to change the world if only just a little.

But then again, this may just be the flu talking.

Well, quickly scrolling through my old posts reminds me of all the friends I used to hang out with. It's not that we're not friends anymore, it's not that we couldn't hang out anymore, but it's just different, something that was there isn't anymore; and I find that a little sad. I'm sure I will feel like army when I leave 1.5 years later; it's just this endless cycle chipping me away bit by bit.

Enough of this depressing sentimental bullshit.
We have survived through yet another year, and that is awesome in itself. 

It's 13 minutes to 2014.
Here's to a better year, cheers.

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