I was originally going to sleep, and free myself from all the fatigue and muscle aches. However, after watching the season one finale of Gokusen, it kinda kicked me back into this thinking mode.
The mode where I wonder, "What the hell am I doing with my life?"
I feel like I have these internal thoughts way too often, but when you're stuck in the army doing things that you don't want to do; thoughts like these have their way of creeping up to you at the most unexpected timings.
The show Gokusen is about a teacher leading her delinquent class through graduation. Firstly, it really made me miss my school days where I had fun and did stupid things with all my friends. Secondly, it made me think about where I should head from now in life. The things that I should really put effort in instead of just stumbling through the days.
Fortunately, I was assigned some projects that allowed me to stretch my rusting skills a little, bringing me back to my passion. But that also made me realize how long I spent not putting any effort into my passion. Interestingly, because of the project requirements, I picked up a new programming language: C#. Along with some .NET stuffs and SQL.
I guess there really isn't any point worrying about it. After all. I am at a crossroad in life. I simply have more time to think about it rather than making that important choice quickly like most people have to.
As much as I can't wait to get out of the army (9 months and counting down), the life ahead out of this place really isn't the heaven I envisioned it to be. The chore of making
decisions that could make or break your life, I really need to start working on it.